Here’s our third contribution to answering the common questions men have about starting a small group for the purpose of spiritual growth and moral protection. In Step 1, we talked about how it takes a team. In Step 2 we talked about how to find your band of brothers and just hang-out. So now let’s find out how to connect to these “brothers”.
Who should be in my group?
First, let’s cover 5 things you don’t have to be concerned with. Youdon’t have to find guys who…
…go to your church
…are from your denomination.
…have the same career or job as you.
…have the same interests and hobbies as you.
…have the same temperament or personality as you.
In short, don’t look for guys just like you. Diversity can add strength.
Now, the 5 things you should focus on. You do need to find guys who…
…are close in proximity to your age and place in life to better relate.
…will be honest with you and themselves.
…desire to follow Jesus.
…are willing to help each other grow in the faith.
…will sacrifice and risk for each other for the sake of becoming like Jesus.
So how many of these guys do I need?
The number is truly up to you. If you allow Him to, God will direct you to the “who,” answering also the “how many.” Here are a couple of points to consider…
Just two guys can sometimes be a challenge in accountability, because you never want an issue to become a standoff that distracts you from your goal.
Too many guys in your group may water down the honesty or cause you to have to rush on the time allowed to get everyone’s contribution in. This isn’t Sunday school where the rule is “the more, the merrier,” because “we’re just listening to a lecture anyway.” In a small group, everyone shares every week, unless someone has a crisis that requires focus.
In my personal opinion amassed over many years, I recommend at least 3 and no more than 5 on the “how many is optimum” question.